Category Archives: Humor

Shoot them in the Dick

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Quote of the Day

In a defensive scenario you never want to go for the face. You always want to go Center Mass or my personal favorite the dick.

If you make it the mistake of trying to rob me oh you freaking dumb ass. Guess what? You’re getting a shot towards a dick.

Reason being the pelvis actually holds up the whole entire body. If you take that out they are now immobile. And, you get to shoot them in the dick more.

Body armor? No problem shoot them in the dick!

Someone’s taller than you? No problem! Shoot them in the dick!

Moral of the story? I’m probably going to shoot you in the dick, honestly.

SHORTSHOT TONY
February 20, 2025
Aim for the other head! #selfdefense #shortshottony #9mm #glock #detroiturbansurvivaltraining

Via Chuck Petras @Chuck_Petras.

This is reasonable advice if your attacker does not have a gun of their own. Adjust appropriately for non-males who are an imminent threat to innocent life.

I’m reminded for the woman who committed murder with a shotgun blast to “the pubic region” of a woman. The victim had been talking to the murder’s ex-boyfriend.

This happened in Orofino Idaho where I went to high school.

Equity Via the Los Angeles Fires

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Quote of the Day

Amidst all of the condemnation of Gavin Newsom, Karen Bass and the rest of California’s Democrat/DEI leadership, we need to give credit where credit is due.

They succeeded brilliantly in bringing equity to Los Angeles.

Now, billionaire movie stars enjoy the same living conditions as the rest of California’s homeless population.

Good job guys, you have achieved “equity”! Yay!

Cynical Publius @CynicalPublius
Posted on X, January 11, 2025

While this is worth a smile and probably a laugh, they have not really achieved equity.

At last count I read, there were only 11 people that achieved total equity. It has been a good try. However, Stalin, Pol Pot, Mao, and other communists set the bars for lifetime achievement awards much higher.

What Libertarians Mean By Pro-Gun

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Via Will Harter @RealWillHarter:

As a libertarian, I suspect there is some truth in this claim.

Gold Price Forecasts

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The current spot price of gold is $2,656.41. But what will it be a few months or years from now?

From earlier today we have a self-proclaimed expert saying:

Gold Won’t Save You From Historic Market Bubble Bursting: Henrik Zeberg

“I think gold is actually in a kind of a smaller bubble by itself now,” Zeberg stated. “I think you’re going to see a rather strong decline in gold to the very reasons that I just said talked about here.”

Zeberg’s bearish stance on gold is rooted in his expectation of a deflationary bust. As the economy contracts and inflation falls, the US dollar is likely to strengthen, making gold a less attractive asset.

“I don’t want to hold gold into that environment,” he said. “I actually think it’s a very bad environment to hold gold.”

From an entire panel of experts on October 22nd:

Latest Gold Price Forecast & Predictions | Gold Eagle

Gold Forecast 1 Year
Bullish: $3,200
Medium-term price drivers:
US dollar, bear market in stocks and recession, investor sentiment

Gold Forecast 3 Years
Bullish: $4,825
Long-term price drivers:
US dollar, US budget deficits, central bank monetary debasement, negative real interest rates, and the potential for an uptick in sovereign buying.

I’m reminded of something an old engineer I knew many years ago was fond of saying:

The wonderful thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.

It Just the Law, It Doesn’t Have to Make Sense

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Quote of the Day

Trump getting the nuclear codes while he legally can’t own a gun is objectively hilarious. Like something out of satire.

Kostas Moros @MorosKostas
Posted on X, November 6, 2024

That is funny!

On a much smaller scale, In Seattle, I can be legally carrying a fully loaded handgun and a spare magazine. Then, get arrested for the slingshot in my hip pocket.

Increasing the Anguish

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Quote of the Day

Above all I would advise people against posting expressions and videos of their personal anguish over the election, there is a substantial number of people here who use this as masturbation material.

David Burge @iowahawkblog
Posted on X, November 6, 2024

Sure, this is rather funny. I doubt there is much truth to it though. Yeah, there are some really strange kinks out there. But I doubt there are “a substantial number of people” which find this sexually arousing.

I think the more likely situation is that Burge finds it humorous to increase the anguish.

Although, there is one person who replied to his post with “I’m literally out of lube and shooting dust”. But I think he is joking too.

Minnesota Tourism Video

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This is my style of humor done better than I could dream about even if I had a decade to think on it.

Knowledge is Power

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Quote of the Day

Via a post on X from Chuck Petras @Chuck_Petras.

I suspect this may only work for very low-pressure cartridges such as .22 LR. And there may be some accuracy issues for the first few shots.

Hitler is Okay

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Quote of the Day

With news continuing to filter in about the second assassination attempt on former President Donald Trump, the nation’s prominent Democrats expressed relief that Hitler was OK.

Following a busy weekend of making public statements and social media posts clearly identifying Trump as “literally Hitler” and telling the country that he posed a grave threat to the existence of the United States, Democratic leaders quickly made it known how glad they were to find out he was unharmed.

“We’re just glad the greatest threat to democracy is safe,” said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. “I know just an hour or so before he narrowly avoided a second attempt on his life I posted online about how he was leading the charge to destroy America and had to be stopped, but I’m relieved to hear that he wasn’t harmed.”

The Babylon Bee
September 16, 2024
Democrats Express Relief That Hitler Is OK | Babylon Bee

To me, The Babylon Bee sometimes is a little bit lame, but this is funny as well as making a great point.

Only a Little Bit of Exaggeration

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Quote of the Day

Heading into last weekend the heavy money was on Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro getting the nod from the DNC to be Harris’s running mate. I was always skeptical of that, given the current state of the Democratic Party. It seemed a bit of a stretch that the virulently antisemitic Democrats of 2024 would pick a Jewish man to be on the ticket. Seriously, Shapiro is lucky that the Dems didn’t call in some of the Squad’s brownshirts to give him a wrist tattoo and striped pajamas. 

Stephen Kruiser
August 7, 2024
The Morning Briefing: Two Commies Walk Into a Presidential Ticket…

While there is some of truth to this, there is a little bit more exaggeration than truth.

On Emperors

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Quote of the Day

We should be thanking the stupid commie bastards. We just wanted to elect him as president.

Shit like that will make him a f–k’in emperor.

MTHead
July 15, 2024
Comment to Call for Calm

As I am not a fan of emperors I won’t be thanking anyone about this.

That said, I did think this was rather funny. I really like sick humor…

Memes

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From Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it harder for sober people to own cars. (bookey.app):

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From David Thompson @DBThompsonUS:

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From Josh Boehm @BaronBoehm:

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From Planet Of Memes @PlanetOfMemes:image

From Liberty NH @NHpilled · Jul 5 Chad energy:

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From Planet Of Memes @PlanetOfMemes:

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That last one has its humor but we all know it is false. After seeing that, they would burn your house down with you in it, destroying the list, and the claim they did it for your children who were in the house with you..

Russia Versus America and NATO

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I think I found this on X or Gab. I’m just not sure where:

A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked, “What’s this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?” Her husband replied, “It’s a war to stop America and NATO.” “Oh, right” she says “How’s it going?”

“Well” he replied “so far we have lost over 20 generals, 100,000 troops killed, countless injured, 3000 tanks, 300 aircraft, hundreds of helicopters, countless armoured vehicles, artillery and trucks, our flagship along with other naval ships, our army is being defeated in most areas and we have had to resort to conscripting 500,000 Russians including murders and rapists to replace our losses”.

“Wow” replied the wife “what about America and NATO”?

“They haven’t turned up yet”

While not entirely true, there is probably a little too much truth to be funny to the top Russian politicians and the military.

Death Comes For Them All

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Quote of the Day

Death comes for them all.

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Firearms Policy Coalition @gunpolicy
Posted on X June 14, 2024

The ATF rules are different than “assault weapon” bans, but I think the odds are good that SCOTUS will eventually kill them too.

I like the FPC. They work on a lot of 2nd Amendment cases, get decent results so I donate a fair amount of money (matched by my employer) to them each year.

Hmmm… No.

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Also via Happy Little Memes – According To Hoyt:

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While amusing, don’t post this at the entrance to your home. Should you ever be forced to defend innocence life using deadly force the meme would likely be used as evidence at your trial.

Enough Truth to be Funny

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Paul K. sent me a link to this meme, which is from Happy Little Memes – According To Hoyt:

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It is not true. But it has enough truth in it to be funny. Very funny.

It’s True

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I’m 6’ 3’” and Barb is 6’ 1”. She has an inseam that is two inches longer than mine.

I showed her this meme from Happy Little Memes – According To Hoyt::

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The response was an instant laugh followed by, “It’s true!”

Internally, I quibble a little bit with that assessment, but not so much that I would actually vocalize it.

Words of Wisdom

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From my 40 year old collection of quotes:

Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter.  However, soon after the weather turned cold, the sparrow changed his mind and reluctantly started to fly south.  After a short time, ice began to form his on his wings and he fell to earth in a barnyard almost frozen.  A cow passed by and crapped on this little bird and the sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings.  Warm and happy the little sparrow began to sing.  Just then, a large Tom cat came by and hearing the chirping investigated the sounds.  As Old Tom cleared away the manure, he found the chirping bird and promptly ate him.

There are three morals to this story:

1)  Everyone who shits on you is not necessarily your enemy.
2)  Everyone who gets you out of shit is not necessarily your friend.
3)  If you are warm and happy in a pile of shit, keep your mouth shut.

There is another moral told indirectly by this story: Chesteron’s Fence.

ATF Screenshot

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From Hard Pass @HardPass4, via a tweet from Chuck Petras @Chuck_Petras:

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There is a little too much truth in this.

It is Funny Because it is True

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Via Elon Musk on X: ” https://t.co/hkoCUJOcz8″ / X (twitter.com).