Category Archives: Sex

This tends toward the academic rather than the erotic. But not entirely.

Quote of the day—Moms Demand Action

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Moms Demand Action supports the 2nd Amendment, but we believe common-sense solutions can help decrease the escalating epidemic of gun violence that kills too many of our children and loved ones every day. Whether the gun violence happens in urban Chicago, suburban Virginia, or rural Texas, we must act now on new and stronger gun laws and policies to protect our children.

Moms Demand Action
Web page, as of April 28, 2014
[I find it very telling that if they enumerate what they think are “common-sense solutions” they don’t make them easy to find on their web site. I couldn’t find them. If they really had solutions don’t you think they would announce them all to the world? What this means to me is they are running an emotional appeal, as they have already admitted, and will push whatever restrictive law they believe has a chance of passing. Facts and logic aren’t their tools in trade.

From reading their press releases and get the facts web pages it appears that for starters they want to stop public carry, ban modern sporting rifles, ban standard capacity magazines, and eliminate “stand your ground laws”. And if they were successful doing that you can be sure they would find a lot more “common-sense” restrictions they support.

I have to conclude Moms Demand Action demands are mostly hysteria and wonder if the traditional cure for it wouldn’t bring us all some relief.—Joe]

We have interesting friends

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Some friends of ours are leaving the area for a year or two and we recently said goodbye to them. We had only met them a few months ago but really liked them. They are very smart, happy, high energy people. When we went on the cruise in the Bahamas last month we invited them to go with us. There was no one else we even considered.

They didn’t go. They said they really tried to make it work but just couldn’t. The fact that it was a Disney Cruise did not seem to be an issue.

In my personal life I keep this blog in the background and don’t bring it up unless I think they are going to be okay with it. I hadn’t mentioned it to them until this last meeting. I explained it was a little controversial and could bother some people.

It turns out they have blogs that are “interesting” too.

NOT safe for work.

Blissfully Open and Compersive Times.

We have interesting friends.

Quote of the day—Glen Reynolds

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Are there any TV shows where the male hosts all chortle about their masturbation methods?

Glenn Reynolds
February 19, 2014
THINGS YOU MISS BY NOT WATCHING THE VIEW:
[Probably not and I don’t really care. Part of the reason is probably because of an anti-men agenda of the media. And the other part is probably because men don’t have the capacity to enjoy orgasms at a rate that requires electric motors powered from 117V household mains to keep up with them.

But it is interesting that talk about sex in the mainstream media appears to be becoming more acceptable.—Joe]

Random thought of the day

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To a certain extent guns are like sex. Once someone becomes sexually active they seldom voluntarily become asexual let alone anti-sexual. And so it is with people who learn to use guns in a safe and supportive environment.

Many anti-gun people are proud they have never fired a gun and vow to never shoot one. “Guns only have one purpose!”, they insist. They wear their ignorance with pride and yet demand they should legislate the rules of ownership. And so it is in some social circles in regards to sexual activities.

But most people would laugh and, at their most charitable, say, “How cute!” if monks who had taken vows of celibacy were demanding laws which regulated sexual behavior between consenting adults. “No one needs sex more than once a month!”, they might demand.

And once such people gained control government registration of each sexual union would be “just common sense” to reduce the transmission of sexual diseases. Sympathetic courts would rule that government had an interest in protecting the safety of the citizens and the registration law, no matter how unlikely to be complied with, it has a rational basis and hence overrides the non-enumerated constitutional right to privacy.

And of course many gun control advocates really are nothing but Puritans afraid someone somewhere is having fun.

That was a first

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This morning Barb and I did some errands together. One of these was for me to get a dress shirt for a party we are attending tonight. While out I got a call from a friend with a well deserved nickname of “Brazen E.” which went something like the following. It was a real “first” for me.

Joe: Hello E.

E: Hi! What are you doing? Are you with your family in Idaho?

J: No. I got back last night. I’m in a dressing room at J.C. Penney’s. What about you?

E: We had a nice Christmas. I’m in a room with my daughter and can’t say a whole lot but I’m feeling pretty hormonal. I got permission from my husband and you are the first person I thought of.

J: Ahhh… Oh! So you are looking for some “benefits” from a friend?

E: Exactly! So, are you available?

J: Uhhh… [How do you say, “No” to someone who has the courage to ask for, and gets, permission from their husband to come play with you for a few hours?]

I’ll talk to Barb about it but we are pretty busy today and we are going to a party tonight. Maybe you could find someone at the party tonight. Would you like to go with us?

E: No. I don’t think so. Let me know if you change your mind.

J: I’m pretty sure it’s not going to work out. If you have another opportunity you should take it rather than waiting for me to call back.

E: Yeah. I already tried one, but he said he would rather sleep.

J: That was your husband?

E: Yes.

J: I see. Okay. Well good luck finding someone!

As I expected Barb did not think it was a good use of my time this afternoon.

More on Markley’s law

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PETA is now promoting the idea that eating chicken will result in a small penis and other problems.

Well sure– If the idea that animals are essentially equal to humans doesn’t stop us from eating animals, then we might as well take the penis angle, because apparently people care more about penises (and sex) than practically anything else. It’s bound to get a few more, uh, members.

This is part of a long term trend. Leftists used to attack people they don’t like by calling us “fags” or “queers” but since they now have to pretend that they’re promoting the rights of homosexuals, they have to turn to other methods of distraction. Hence Markley’s law, and the recent PETA story is part of the same trend of using sex as a cultural/political lever.

A common phrase used back in the 1960s and early ’70s (the Vietnam war period) was “Girls say yes to guys who say no”. It’s an appeal to young, horny men, telling them straight up that they’ll get laid more if they at least pretend to help support the Progressives and the communists.

It’s a common theme among communists, to get the vulnerable young people on board, and sex is a powerful lure. Charles Manson used young women as bait to sucker young males into the group, and Sun Myung Moon, Jim Jones, the Heavens Gate Cult and others in a long line of socialist predators (but I repeat myself) followed very similar tactics. Islamists, we are told, will be treated to a harem of dozens of virgins if they die in the great and glorious jihad (and Allah will be super happy about your killing people too, but seriously; virgins!). They could just as well promote a new scientific study which finds that reading American freedom blogs will result in sexual dysfunction, and so the 72 virgins in heaven might go unsatisfied, and we wouldn’t want THAT to happen would we? If they haven’t done it already, they will.

Nothing changes. PETA has just put a slightly different twist on it, but their new spin has a lot of precedent. It is a good one though, as the left has also been trying to make us fear our food, our water, our air, and our neighbors, and this gimmick hits on at least two fronts.

And so I say to PETA; Good one, guys! Right on! You’re in good company. Keep up the good work. You’re completely insane, sure, but you’re giving it the old college try, you’re learning from your predecessors, and that deserves some respect.

Parenthetically; if animals raised for slaughter are as good and have rights the same as people, then people are no better and have no more rights than animals raised for slaughter, which is the whole point of organizations like PETA even if most of their members are clueless kids just trying to get laid. Remember it.

Quote of the day—Billll

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Luring her out to the range to shoot your EBR is all well and good, but when it transpires that you have no ammo due to the national shortage, it begins to look like the old dodge of “running out of gas” at inspiration point.

Billll
August 27, 2013
Comment to Quote of the day—Amber Callipo
[I’ve “lured” women to the range with EBRs on many occasions. But in no case was there a sexual element present on my part that wasn’t established prior to the invitation to the range. I just don’t feel the connection between guns and sex like some people do and tend to be oblivious. That is until the woman makes her intentions clear that, at least for her, there is a connection.

Your mileage may vary.—Joe]

Quote of the day—Amber Callipo

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@backgroundn015e @barronbarnett @smrzle @toddkincannon an assault rifle is used to lure for women. Disappointment soon follows.

Amber Callipo (@Acallipo)
Tweeted on February 6, 2013
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!

H/T to Barron.—Joe]

Quote of the day—Pat L.

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I used to think I would die from an angry father. Then I thought it would be from an angry husband. Now I just worry about an angry wife.

Pat L.
August 9, 2013
[This was at our high school reunion last night.

I’m pretty sure there is more to this story and that I know what it is but he wasn’t sharing it so I won’t speculate here.—Joe]

You can’t make this stuff up

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All I know for certain about this person is they are ignorant, an Android user, and Sitemeter captured their visit to my blog. My hope is that those vectors are orthogonal. Their entry page to my blog is here.

Check out the search phrase, “what is the red spot indicates whether a man is virgin r not”:

Domain Name   (Unknown) 
IP Address   101.223.172.# (Unknown Organization)
ISP   Unknown ISP
Location  
Continent  : Unknown
Country  : Unknown
Lat/Long  : unknown
Language   English en
Operating System   Linux Unknown
Browser   Safari 1.3 Mozilla/5.0 (Linux; U; Android 2.3.6; en-gb; GT-S5360 Build/GINGERBREAD) AppleWebKit/533.1 (KHTML, like Gecko) Version/4.0 Mobile Safari/533.1
Javascript   version 1.5
Monitor  
Resolution  :  320 x 401
Color Depth  :  32 bits
Time of Visit   Aug 6 2013 7:48:46 am
Last Page View   Aug 6 2013 7:48:46 am
Visit Length   0 seconds
Page Views   1
Referring URL   http://www.google.co…in r not&v=133247963
Search Engine   google.co.in
Search Words   what is the red spot indicates whether a man is virgin r not
Visit Entry Page   http://blog.joehuffm…ased-virginity-test/
Visit Exit Page   http://blog.joehuffm…ased-virginity-test/
Out Click    
Time Zone   UTC-1:00
Visitor’s Time   Aug 6 2013 2:48:46 pm
Visit Number   1,738,272

Epic pickup line

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While returning from lunch today Barb L. and I saw this guy wandering the sidewalks of Seattle:

WP_20130723_001Cropped

This is a better picture of his sign:
WP_20130723_002Cropped

I can’t claim expertise on pickup lines (or even ever attempted one) but I’m pretty sure this guy is going to be experiencing some epic failure in his quest.

Looking younger

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More support for Dr. Joe’s cure for everything:

Dr. David Weeks, a British consultant clinical psychologist and former head of old age psychology at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital, made us blush with his research that claims regular sex can make you look younger. In a new study, Dr. Weeks found that older men and women with an active sex life appeared five to seven years younger than their actual age.

Following the links a bit we arrive at this:

The 59-year-old will tell a British Psychological Society conference today about his research, where he asked men and women questions about their sex lives. He found those who looked younger than their age claimed to have sex an average 50 per cent more – in the 40-to-50 age group equating to three times a week rather than twice.

I found no mention of results similar to that found by my students as to what happens when the frequency is increased to once or more per day. These researchers really need to keep up.

Posted in Sex

Quote of the day—Background N015e

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@acallipo @barronbarnett @smrzle @toddkincannon “It looked so long and hard, but then he emptied his clip soooo fast…..*sigh*… oh well.

Background N015e (@backgroundN015e)
Tweeted February 6, 2013
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!

H/T to Barron.—Joe]

Bra stories

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Last night Barb L and I were hanging out with a bunch of friends. The woman who, a few months ago, reported breast enlargement after frequent “Dr. Joe’s Cure for Everything” treatments was there. She was telling all her friends, “See! Look at this! I went from an ‘A’ cup to a ‘C’!” “And”, she continued, pointing to her boyfriend, “It’s all because of him!” At first people thought he had paid for a boob job. Nope; It was the continuing application of the treatments advocated by Dr. Joe.

Apparently five minutes of continuous orgasms once a day (she claims, “I didn’t even know that was possible!”) for a few months stimulates enough hormones to dramatically affect breast size. She says she is continuing the treatments and is increasing the frequency of treatments to twice a day. She went on to say, perhaps jokingly, that she anticipates another increase of two cup sizes in a few more months.

Since she gives Dr. Joe partial credit I asked for pictures. This evening I received this picture:

V__03F6

Yeah. Not quite what I was hoping for either.

Entirely by coincidence I stumbled across this blog post yesterday. She references Dressed To Kill: The Link between Breast Cancer and Bras.

She claims:

  • Women who do not wear bras (or rarely ever) have a risk of 1 in 168 chance of developing breast cancer.
  • Women who wear a bra less than 12 hours a day have a 1 in 152 chance of developing breast cancer.
  • Women who wear a bra more than 12 hours a day, but not to sleep have a 1 in 7 chance of developing breast cancer.
  • Women who wear a bra 24 hours a day have a 3 in 4 chance of developing breast cancer.

And of course there are the obvious conclusions that a guy like me would love to endorse but further research on my part turns up this information:

The book’s claim that bras cause breast cancer has been dismissed by the medical and scientific communities; the National Cancer Institute, the American Cancer Society, and the National Institutes of Health have all concluded that there is no link between bra use and breast cancer.

Heavy sigh. I’m probably too honest. I’ve been accused of that before.

Quote of the day—J

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Now I want a Windows phone. You’ve done what the marketing department at Microsoft could not.

J
June 12, 2013
[This was in response to my post about “shipping” my exterior ballistics app for Windows Phone.

That’s pretty pleasing because one of the things that weighs heavy on my mind is that, as Barb L., reminded me the night before I submitted the app is that, “This is for people that are really into long range shooting and own a Windows Phone. That’s a pretty small market.”

Totally off topic. I don’t know who ‘J’ is in this context but my first thought was the author of this book. I’m pretty sure the author of that book wouldn’t use this gravatar so I can rule her out.

I remember Larry H. giving me copy of that book when he was finished with it. I was sophomore in high school at the time it opened my eyes about some things. Then my dad found it tucked behind some insulation in the attic and took it away.—Joe]

Quote of the day—Tim Wadsworth

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There’s an overall increase in sense of well-being that comes with engaging in sex more frequently, but there’s also this relative aspect to it. Having more sex makes us happy, but thinking we are having more sex than other people makes us even happier.

Tim Wadsworth
April 2013
Keeping up with the Joneses? Having more sex than your friends makes you happier, study finds
[Well duh!

I just hope no tax money was used to do his study. But it’s difficult to imagine any private investors sponsoring such a thing so it probably many taken at the point of a gun.

There is in interesting angle about this. People are made happy if they are better off than their neighbors. Or, put another way, people are less happy if their neighbors are better off than them. The progressives/communists prey upon this unhappiness and offer to bring the haves down to the level of the have-nots.

So when the communists get their way and everyone has equal material possessions and people are still not equally happy because of disparate quality or quantity of sex what will they advocate for then? Will people with super model appearances be required to “share” with the “less fortunate”?—Joe]

Quote of the day—Cook’s Helper

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Cook: [Pointing to a very well endowed woman’s breast area] You have some soup on your shirt there.

Cook’s Helper: Damn!

Cook’s Helper 2: Would like someone to lick it off for you?

Cook’s Helper: One of my three partners will get to it before you could.

Overheard April 13, 2013
[I have interesting friends.—Joe]

Five year plan?

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From Tyler Durden:

Yesterday Senator Tom Harkin introduced S. 544, “a bill to require the President to develop a comprehensive national manufacturing strategy.”

In effect, Senator Harkin wants the President to centrally plan the economy. Never mind that the President has zero experience in business or manufacturing. But hey, this worked out so well for Stalinist Russia, it’s no wonder Mr. Harkin wants to copy that model.

If I were emperor of the U.S. I could come up with a plan that outperform anything the President could accomplish in five years and have it implemented in five days. It’s really simple:

Government shall make no law restricting the free association of people other than a tax on retail sales not to exceed 5% and to enforce contracts freely entered into by people and companies.

All waste products shall be safely contained or returned to the natural environment in such a manner that those people responsible for producer of said waste are willing to build their own homes on, eat, breath, or drink said waste products.

In five years there would so much wealth generated there would be private companies with terraforming Mars, robots bringing mining products back from the asteroid belt, and sex tourists going on vacations to the resorts in low earth orbit.

Dr. Joe’s cure for migraines

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H/T to Barron for the email.

There is evidence that Dr. Joe’s Cure for everything works for migraines:

“There’s a [portion] of patients with migraines, about one-third, who experience relief from a migraine attack by sexual activity,” said study researcher Stefan Evers, a neurologist and headache specialist at the University of Münster in Germany.

The researchers aren’t sure why this happens, but hypothesize that the rush of endorphins, the brain’s natural painkillers, during sex may numb the pain of migraines.

Previous confirmation of this were preliminary. These results were based on a larger sample than had previously been reported.

I recommend using Dr. Joe’s cure prophylactically instead of waiting for the onset of symptoms but more tests are needed. Please send me your videos so I can study the issue further.

Posted in Sex

Breast enlargement

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I’m not a fan of breast implants. Sure, if there has been disease or injury then I think it’s fine. But I would never encourage a woman in my life to go through such a thing strictly to get bigger boobs.

However I recently received a report on breast enlargement that Dr. Joe approves of. A friend reports that her breasts in middle age and after multiple children were “showing their age”. Although not large they were sagging. A few months ago she started a program of “sexual rehabilitation” after many years of infrequent and, at best, unsatisfying sex. She now reports her breasts are larger and no longer sag. She attributes this to much more frequent and satisfying sex. “Its the hormones!”, she claims. And, no, she isn’t pregnant.

The climax, so to speak, of her rehabilitation came with the winning of an amateur strip contest last Wednesday. She won $100 and got lots of compliments from both women and men.

I was hoping to get before and after pictures to post but I don’t think that is going to happen any time soon.

Posted in Sex