After several well publicized instances of the tiny penis brigade marching through Target stores with their artificial manhood in hand, Target announces that they want you to leave your insecurities and guns at home. Since the total number of people who really want to bring a gun to Target stores is about 11, and all of them are unemployed man-children in Texas, I suspect they won’t miss the business. Hell given the number of weekly gun-fails in the US of A they might save more customers lives in a single year than they lose to the Neanderthal crowd.

Shane Smith
July 3, 2014
Stores behaving well!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via email from Bob S.

Plus we get bonus insults to our maturity and genealogy. Citation needed on the number of people that carry guns into Target stores (I’ve done it dozens of times) and potential for saved lives considering the increased risk from the suggestion that Target stores become victim disarmament zones.

I wonder if he noticed irony of the maturity comment while making references to “the tiny penis brigade”. I suspect not.—Joe]

@LiberalMyopia @KentAtwater4 i rest my case. thanks baggers. btw there’s still daylight to go play with your semi-automatic phallic symbols.

— Full Fathom Five (@FullFathomFive1)
July 9, 2014

[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via One Of Them (‏@tazcat2011).

No data, no logical argument, just insults. It’s the best they have to offer.—Joe]

Open carry activists: jerk-offs with teeny weenies.

Peggy Jones Coquet
July 4, 2014
Facebook comment to PQED: How should people respond to open-carry gun-rights activists?
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via a comment by Barron.—Joe]

The open carry crowd. Their guns have more bullets in them than they have IQ points. They consistently demonstrate that they need a gun to walk out into public places. Frightened, scared and cowardly they parade their failings for all to see. What’s next? Open carry their penises to prove they have one?

I-84
June 17, 2014
Comment to Gun-control, open-carry supporters stage dueling demonstrations one week after Reynolds shooting
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

Fools, yourself included, who think their metal penises require public display?
Have issues of inadequacy.

jw1
July 2, 2014
Comment to Big Win For Gun Control Groups: Target Bans Guns In Its Stores
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!–Joe]

There is NO LEGITIMATE REASON to open carry in any Target Store anywhere at anytime. Anyone doing so should be arrested and slapped into handcuffs for disturbing the peace–or better yet–indecent exposure. If enough people insisted on that, these malevolent dolts might keep their substitute penises in their pants and away from children, the elderly, and decent people everywhere. Enough! You whip your penis–substitute or real–in a public shopping area, you go to jail, like the lowlife you are.

bwakfat
July 3, 2014
Comment to Big Win For Gun Control Groups: Target Bans Guns In Its Stores
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!–Joe]

Whenever these gun-toting knuckleheads see the Target logo, they get all moist in the loins and have an uncontrollable desire to whip out their weaponry for all the world to see.

labman​57
July 2, 2014
Comment to Big Win For Gun Control Groups: Target Bans Guns In Its Stores
[Emphasis in the original.

It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!–Joe]

@tazcat2011 Obviously, I better buy a surrogate penis in the guise of a firearm and walk through Home Depot and Target.

— Trysha (@MapleysMorsels)
July 2, 2014

[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via Mark‏ (@tazcat2011).—Joe]

But if gun owners carry their penis substitutes into Target where “open carry” is legal, Target can’t prevent it. “Respectfully requesting” doesn’t mean anything to these freaks.

Candi​Rue
July 2, 2014
Comment to Big Win For Gun Control Groups: Target Bans Guns In Its Stores
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!–Joe]

We’ve reached a level of cultural domination where the most effective anti-gun groups have adopted a strategy of demanding concealed carry.

Don Gwinn
July 27, 2014
Comment on Facebook about MDA Supporters Protest TOPLESS Against Texas Open Carry Group (bonus Markley’s law in one of the pictures)
[There is a certain amount of truth to that.

In the article the author says he failed to see the connection “between bullets and boobs”. But it seems to me it was all about open carry. Just for the record, I’m fine with the open carry of bullets, guns, or boobs.—Joe]

@tazcat2011: 🙂 I don’t have to stroke a metal penis to feel like I have something to offer the world. Yes. I don’t have to defend that.

— Trysha (@MapleysMorsels)
July 2, 2014

[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via Mark‏ (@tazcat2011).—Joe]

The bigger the gun, the tinier the penis, and while that may be absolutely, 100-percent true in every single case, there are other things guns compensate for.

John Loos
June 24, 2014
8 Things Guns Compensate For (Besides Your Penis)

[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via Say Uncle.

The entire article is stereotyped bigotry and prejudice. Supposedly the article is funny but would anyone think it was funny if stereotypes of blacks/gays/Jews were used instead?

And is that a real gun tucked into the front of his pants? It looks odd to me.—Joe]

@SPQRzilla @GunSenseUSA If you need a gun, you obviously have a very small and ineffective penis. Truth hurts.

Qrys Bin Thynkn (@QrysBinThynkn)
July 13, 2014

[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday! Via Mark (‏@tazcat2011).

It’s mind boggling how stupid some people are. In what universe does this even begin to make sense or have any hope of making a productive contribution to a discussion about gun ownership?—Joe]