Why would anyone, other than law enforcement, need to carry a loaded gun into national parks or wildlife refuges? How many more of these demented decrees from George Bush do we have to endure before his reign ends? Why exactly does he feel the need to accommodate a few insecure individuals who need to carry a loaded gun to compensate for their lack of manhood? Was that perhaps Dick’s idea?

Despite the sheer stupidity of this last-minute decision, I’m not too worried.These immature gun fanatics are not the type who would visit and appreciate a national park anyway. They are mostly found in bars where they, in drunken stupor, shoot themselves in the legs.

Margrit Novack
December 13, 2008
Guns in parks shows lack of manhood
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

Guns? Have at it. If only the stupid dickless wonders (and I don’t mean the women) who feel the need to whip it out in public would keep it amongst themselves, then I would say let Darwinism take over (such as the Southern states who’ve decided it’s a nifty idea to allow guns into bars).

asiangrrIMN
Comment to Open Thread: Penis Substitutes At the Ready!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

Anybody openly carrying a gun into Starbucks (or anywhere else) to “make a point” or “exercise a right” is inherently unqualified to carry a weapon. This is a fundamentally improper use of a firearm.
 
Like your dick, you only take out your gun if you are prepared to use it. You don’t openly carry it into a coffee bar to scare the liberals. This identifies you as a cheap tin can that shouldn’t be allowed near anything as powerful as a Model 29 or to use the other common penis substitute, a Porsche Turbo Carrera.

Honus
March 4, 2010
Comment to Open Thread: Penis Substitutes At the Ready!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

I’ll give you my cold, dead dick when you take it from my gun-wielding hands!

Quiddity
March 4, 2010
Comment to Open Thread: Penis Substitutes At the Ready!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

What happened to the old fashioned way of using your car to compensate for penis size? Suddenly I feel a wee bit less safe indulging in my coffee in the morning.

Yutsano
March 4, 2010
Comment to Open Thread: Penis Substitutes At the Ready!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

#candyheartrejects #GunPornParadise #NotMuchtoHoldDownThereOtherwise #NRA @Starbucks #brewnotbullets #valentines http://bit.ly/ADwdYY

Gun Victims Action
9:17 AM 14 February 2012
Via Bitter
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

How many Billion people in the world Don’t carry a gun? Ever. And live to tell about it. They don’t get the shit kicked out of themselves day in and day out, and most important they most likely have normal sized genitalia.

Ruckus
March 4, 2010
Comment to Open Thread: Penis Substitutes At the Ready!
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!

How many billions of people in the world don’t use their fire extinguisher, smoke detector, or car seatbelt and live to tell about it? Yet it’s going to be rare that people make fun of them for possessing those safety items.

How many people wish they were carrying a gun when they were mugged, raped, or kidnapped?

And how many of those nearly one hundred million people that were murdered by their own government in the 20^th Century wished they had a gun as they were lined up at the ditches waiting for the bullet to the back of the neck, starving in concentration camps, or arrested in the middle of the night and taken to a basement cell for execution?—Joe]

A gun is psychologically a penis-substitute and a symbol of power: the age-range of toy-shop clientele begins at about six or seven, rises sharply just before puberty and declines soon after the discovery of the phallus and its promise of power. From then on, guns are for kids and for the effete freaks and misfits who must seek psycho-orgasmic relief by shooting pheasants.

Adam Hall
The Quiller Memorandum, page 101 (hardcover version).
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!—Joe]

Wearing them in public is like a 10 year old walking around wearing his cowboy hat and six-shooter. It invites trouble as you are daring anyone to pick a fight with you which a lot of people do. If you want/need to carry a weapon/gun on you get a CWP and then you don’t have the need to show that yours are bigger than anyone else’s and you still have your “protection”.

1justguy
Comment to Starbucks’ “Pro-Gun” Policy Prompts Gun Victims’ Advocate Group to Launch Nationwide Boycott on Valentine’s Day 2012
[It’s another Markley’s Law Monday!

John Hardin unintentionally lead me to this guy.

Also worthy of note is that technically 1justguy’s claim of people picking a fight with people who are open carrying is factually unsupported. But my hypothesis is that he is not only incorrect but he has the wrong sign on the correlation coefficient.—Joe]