Eclipse quote of the day

From the Lincoln County Idaho Sheriff’s Office:

A few things to keep in mind if you’re visiting our area for the Eclipse.

With the Solar Eclipse almost upon us, I have seen many helpful posts and public service announcements, but I feel they fall short in several areas. I will try to cover some of those.

1. Idaho has a huge amount of public land open to exploring and enjoying, but it isn’t a garbage dump. Take out what you take in. We live here 365 days a year. The public land is our back yard. We hunt, fish, trap, and camp there and will take it as a personal insult if you screw it up.

2. With that being said, not all land is public. There is a lot of private land including ranches and farms that have been in the family for over a hundred years. If there is a No Trespassing sign at a gate or road that means you. Stay out or some gentleman wearing a cowboy hat, wearing irrigating boots, and riding a four-wheeler will let you hear it.

3. We drive trucks, tractors, combines, and swathers on the highway going about our business. They go pretty slow and won’t move faster if you sit behind us and honk. In fact, they actually go a bit slower. We live here. You don’t. Be patient and enjoy the scenery.

4. There is a very good chance you will see someone carrying a firearm. Yes, it is loaded and no I don’t have a damn permit for it. Everybody, and I mean everybody, owns a gun in Idaho and a lot of us carry one quite regularly. Don’t panic. Don’t call the police. And above all, behave and treat us and our state with respect and there won’t be a problem.

5. Our dogs. Our dogs ride in the back of our trucks and they like it. Sure a few slow learners take a tumble every once in a while, but for the most part they do just fine. Don’t pet them while they are in the truck. They will bite you. Numerous times if possible. The truck is their’s not your’s and they take their security duties seriously. Again, don’t panic and don’t call the police because they don’t give a damn and they are probably going to be busy saving some tourist who received incorrect map directions from their Tom-Tom.

6. Our wildlife will kill you and it will hurt the whole time you are dying. Elk, moose, bison, and grizzly bears take great pleasure in playing hacky sack with tourists that get too close. They are wild animals and are not trained circus acts. If you must harass our wildlife, may I suggest you go catch a badger. They are really good cuddlers.

7. Our weather will kill you and yes it will hurt the whole time. It snows here every month of the year. Our back roads become death traps when it rains or snows. Your Prius isn’t an offroad vehicle, so stay on the pavement. Don’t make our brave and skilled First Responders have to go looking for you when you go exploring.

Welcome to Idaho….enjoy the Eclipse and have a safe journey home.

Sheriff Rene Rodriguez

It’s funny because it’s (almost all) true.


13 thoughts on “Eclipse quote of the day

  1. Joe, at a rough guess, what a bear does to a tourist who gets too close is sufficiently similar to hacky sack to pass the sniff test….

  2. In case anyone doubts the infinite stupidity of tourists…

    A couple of items from the Madison County (ID) Sheriffs Dept.

    Deputies found a driver who had gotten lost driving around in the forest. The mapping system in the car was trying to guide them to Driggs and had sent them on the back roads through the mountains. The deputy gave them better directions and sent them on their way.

    “We got a van turned around that was driving on a four-wheeler trail BEFORE they got stuck. They had made it almost to Fish Creek,” Burton said. “They were just looking for a Starbucks.”


  3. good advise throughout all the rural west.

    coming back home from palouse falls w/ a “foreigner.” a couple combines and headers were going down the state highway, at about 15 mph, if that. the “foreigner” got a bit agitated, not bad, but, irritated.

    i suggested that the delay would not last long, and that the combines & header convoy would leave the road asap, as they were on the main highway only because they had to be, and that pretty soon they would take a county road and “get out of the way.” they did precisely that at the next crossroad.

    just an advisement. be patient. you’ll get there.

    john jay

    • 15 MPH is a high speed for a combine. You can only do that if the tires are warmed up and round. If it has been sitting overnight the bottom of the tire will be flattened and it takes a while for it to round out. If you go too fast in that condition you can have difficulty controlling it.

  4. I would imagine that #6 is a primary reason for #4. And both can cause loss of sphincter control in urban tourists, leading to unfortunate release of Number One and/or Number Two.

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