Many years ago, my Great Uncle Walt used to tell a story. I think it was about a brother of his whom I never met. Let’s call him “John.” It went something like this:

John ordered and paid for a car with the exact feature set he wanted. After a few weeks the dealer received the car and offered to deliver it. John said they could deliver it that afternoon and he would be home to receive it.

Sometime later John got another call. It was the dealer telling him, “We are so sorry. While driving your car to your place the driver had an accident and totaled your car.”

John’s response was, “No. That is not what happened. Your driver totaled your car.”

Last Friday Barb and I drove to see a movie in my car. As we pulled away from a traffic light the car barely moved even with the engine at a fairly high RPM. It was almost as if the car was not really in gear. The car behaved normally long enough to get us to the movie. On the way, Barb made an online service appointment for the next day with the dealership. We dropped the car off later that night.

On Saturday, I received word that the torque converter, transmission, rear differential, and battery needed to be replaced. I knew the differential was occasionally making an odd sound and maybe a sort of thumping vibration during some turns. I had been wondering about the battery too. The car computer would notify me via the phone app that it was shutting off communication to save battery after just a day or two of not driving the car. The total would be about $23,000. The Blue Book price of the car is about $15,000.

I found a newer car I liked at Jess Ford in Pullman, Washington for considerably less than I could in the Seattle area. They had two other cars that, while not my top choices, would be good enough to do everything I needed to do for Boomershoot 2026.

On Tuesday of this week, I took a flight to Pullman to look at the car and probably buy it. The salesman met me at the airport, showed me the car, and after looking at the numbers I agreed to buy it. He programmed the door unlock feature with the same code I used for my last two cars, and he set up the app on my phone to communicate with the car. He then directed me to the accountant‑type guy to sign all the paperwork and write the check for the total price of the car. As I was doing that, someone else would take the car to the gas station and fill the tank.

I filled out all the paperwork and had filled out most of the check when the salesman came to the office and asked the accountant‑type guy if he would come out to talk. From the tone of his voice, I knew something was wrong. I stopped writing. What could it be? Did they suspect I was a con artist or something? Did they think my check would bounce?

A minute or so later they came back into the office. They told me the kid who was to fill up the tank had wrecked the car. They didn’t know how bad, but if I didn’t want the car anymore that would be understandable. “We’ll make everything right on this.” Further discussion ensued and I told them that if it was just a dented fender or something they could pay for the repair and I would be fine with that. They appreciated that and said someone was going out to find out how bad the damage was.

After about 15 minutes they came back and solemnly told me that I did not want that car. It was probably totaled. Remembering my Uncle Walt’s story, I told them that I was glad it was their car and not mine.

I asked about the two backup cars I had seen online. Both of them were out as loaner cars. There was nothing else on the lot that I was interested in.

As it was late in the day, they offered me a loaner car, offered to pay for a motel, and offered a free dinner if I would come back the next day when they had one or both of the backup cars on the lot again. I accepted the car, drove to my underground bunker, spent the night, and came back the next morning. I purchased one of the backup cars and drove it home Wednesday afternoon in time for dinner with Barb.

On Thursday the salesman sent me a picture of the car:, Washington for considerably less than I could in the Seattle area. They had two other cars that, while not my top choices, would be good enough to do everything I needed to do for Boomershoot 2026.

On Tuesday of this week, I took a flight to Pullman to look at the car and probably buy it. The salesman met me at the airport and showed me the car and after looking at the numbers I agreed to buy it. He programmed the door unlock feature with the same code I used for my last two cars, and he setup the app on my phone to communicate with the car. He then directed me to the accountant type guy to sign all the paperwork and write the check for the total price of the car. As I was doing that, someone else would take the car to the gas station and fill the tank.

I filled out all the paperwork and had filled out most of the check when the salesman came to the office and asked the accountant type guy if he would come out to talk. From the tone of his voice, I knew something was wrong. I stopped writing. What could it be? Did they suspect I was a con artist or something? Did they think my check would bounce?

A minute or so later they came back in the office. They told me the kid who was to fill up the tank had wrecked the car. They didn’t know how bad, but if I didn’t want the car anymore that would be understandable. “We’ll make everything right on this.” Further discussion ensued and I told them it if was just a dented fender or something they could pay for the repair and I would be fine with that. They appreciated that and said someone was going out to find out how bad the damage was.

After about 15 minutes they came back and solemnly told me that I did not want that car. It probably was totaled. Remembering my Uncle Walt’s story, I told them that I was glad it was their car and not mine.

I asked about the two backup cars I had seen online. Both of them were out as loaner cars. There was nothing else on the lot that I was interested in.

As it was late in the day, they offered me a loaner car, offered to pay for a motel and a free dinner if I would come back the next day when they had one or both of the backup cars on the lot again. I accepted the car, drove to my underground bunker, spent the night and came back late the next morning. I purchased one of the backup cars and drove it home Wednesday afternoon in time for dinner with Barb.

Thursday the salesman sent me a picture of the car:

“Did he roll it?” I asked.
His response: “He rolled it twice.” *

The driver was taken to the hospital, examined, and released. Other than being badly shaken, he is okay. The salesman told me he has been a great employee and will retain his job.

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* Chat GPT, Copilot, and Grok are skeptical of the two rolls. They claim there is no evidence of that in the picture. Claude suggested a complete roll and landing primarily on the driver side rear wheel. Multiple rolls are judged unlikely by Claude. Chat GPT claims a tripping like event caused the wheel/tire damage and the roll.