Americans are having a record low amount of sex. We find that in 1990, 55% of adults ages 18–64 reported having sex weekly, according to the General Social Survey (GSS). But around the turn of the millennium, that number began to dip: by 2010, less than half reported having sex weekly, and by 2024, of the more than 1,000 men and women queried on this topic by the GSS, that number had fallen to just 37 percent.
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While the decline in sex has been most acute among younger generations, older adults have not been left unscathed. And notably, the sex recession is making inroads among married couples. Between 1996 and 2008, 59% of married adults, ages 18-64, reported having sex once a week or more. That number fell to 49% for the period of 2010 to 2024. Married couples are seeing declines in sexual frequency across age groups.
It’s no coincidence that a decline in marital sex follows the digital revolution. Today’s electronic opiates not only depress partnering and marriage among young adults—they also weaken already established relationships. A 2023 IFS study found that married adults reported lower sexual frequency when their spouse substituted couple time for phone or computer use. Furthermore, bedtime procrastination is a rising habit. So-called bedtime procrastinators spend two hours using some form of digital media in the three hours leading up to sleep. It’s not surprising that more social media, Netflix, or gaming on the part of spouses translates to less intimacy.
I was about 2010 when a co-worker at Microsoft told me she wanted to have a second child, but she was having doubts about the desirability of her husband being a long-term partner. He, basically, was no longer interested in sex. He also was a computer programmer at Microsoft and when at home he played video games and wrote software for new video games. He was a decent enough father to their child. She was, and is, quite attractive. They did not lack money, but she wanted physical attention in multiple ways. He spent his time in the digital world.
I suggested counseling and some books, but I don’t think she followed up on any of my suggestions or found an alternate solution. She is still married to the same guy and only has the one child.
It has been years since I last talked to her or even corresponded with her, but it still makes me sad to think about her situation.
Perhaps not relevant in the situation you cite, but as to general trend: Now plot sex vs obesity.
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Interesting!
I shall try that when I have some time.
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The food has been poisoned with all the chemicals and highly processed ingredients, with trans-fats and HFCS everywhere in massive quantities..
The MeToo movement has made dating a minefield.
Feminism has made women non-feminine, and motherhood denigrated in media and academia.
Women have been sold the lie they not only deserve it all, they can have it all.
Porn and pushing tolerance of everything has deadened men’s desire because no-effort skin is everywhere.
Divorce laws have made marriage a horrible risk-reward proposition for men.
As HoeMath so eloquently points out, women tend to marry up, while also demanding equality in the workplace, meaning that they have shrunk the pool of “acceptable men” to marry, resulting in the top 10-20% of men having lots of women chasing them so they have no reason to settle down, while the bottom 80% of men are “not people” who are to be used and disposed of if a monkey-branching opportunity to move to a “higher-value man” comes along, and they are shameless about it.
The pill (and birth control in general) messes with women biology and psychology in very (literally) counterproductive ways.
Modern popular media shows rarely if ever show stable, functional families with a dad (or men in general) that isn’t played for laughs, or as a loser, programming people to be predisposed to that outlook in relationships.
(for those who don’t know HoeMath, this is a good place to start: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3e5v3zQlpI )
None of this is accidental. “Oh, no, there is a worker shortage! Whatever shall we do? Oh, let’s import tens of millions of foreign workers to replace the poor white rubes who are too much stupid losers to even have sex!”
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Porn consumption is positively correlated to having partnered sex.
I suggest you double-check some of those other assertions, too.
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How on earth would anyone know that. Self reporting?
Whose drive is decreasing, men’s or women’s, and why?
Correlation to economic indicators? — I hypothesize that good economy => feel good => do it. We know that strip clubs can be a leading indicator of economic troubles.
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My understanding is that it is both men and women. Social media is the probable cause.
Economy is a reasonable hypothesis. I don’t know if it has been tested.
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If one wanted to degrade civilization whilst minimizing violence could one hatch a more devious or destructive weapon than social-media?
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I myself feel the decline in population is directly related to the lack of drive-in theaters, and vehicles big enough to do the deed in the backseat.
I could be wrong. There are a lot of other things going on.
But in hard economic times? It added a whole new dimension to a cheap date night.
I think it was Van Crevald who said “proximity + diversity = war”
A similar item could be said as “Gun control + diversity = robbery.”
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The connection you point out between digital distractions and intimacy really resonates—phones and streaming services have become a silent competitor for couple time. What’s striking is that this shift isn’t just affecting young people, but married couples too, which suggests it’s more of a cultural change than just a generational one. I wonder if we’ll eventually see a counter-movement where people intentionally unplug at night to reclaim that lost connection.
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True.
I m thinking a lot of it has to do with just being worn out also.
As Vox Day said years ago.
Woman were always consumers. But by pushing them into the work force, it degraded wages as a whole. While maintaining the same amount of consumption. A win-win for business.
So, by the time husband and wife get home and do the kid stuff. They’re warn out.
Top it off with poison food, meds, and constant stress? You get what we got today.
Notice people having the most children are immigrants the government pays to lay around and pop out kids?
And to your last point. You’all do most of your work at night? When you got all that extra power?
Perhaps not relevant in the situation you cite, but as to general trend: Now plot sex vs obesity.
Interesting!
I shall try that when I have some time.
The food has been poisoned with all the chemicals and highly processed ingredients, with trans-fats and HFCS everywhere in massive quantities..
The MeToo movement has made dating a minefield.
Feminism has made women non-feminine, and motherhood denigrated in media and academia.
Women have been sold the lie they not only deserve it all, they can have it all.
Porn and pushing tolerance of everything has deadened men’s desire because no-effort skin is everywhere.
Divorce laws have made marriage a horrible risk-reward proposition for men.
As HoeMath so eloquently points out, women tend to marry up, while also demanding equality in the workplace, meaning that they have shrunk the pool of “acceptable men” to marry, resulting in the top 10-20% of men having lots of women chasing them so they have no reason to settle down, while the bottom 80% of men are “not people” who are to be used and disposed of if a monkey-branching opportunity to move to a “higher-value man” comes along, and they are shameless about it.
The pill (and birth control in general) messes with women biology and psychology in very (literally) counterproductive ways.
Modern popular media shows rarely if ever show stable, functional families with a dad (or men in general) that isn’t played for laughs, or as a loser, programming people to be predisposed to that outlook in relationships.
(for those who don’t know HoeMath, this is a good place to start: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3e5v3zQlpI )
None of this is accidental. “Oh, no, there is a worker shortage! Whatever shall we do? Oh, let’s import tens of millions of foreign workers to replace the poor white rubes who are too much stupid losers to even have sex!”
Porn consumption is positively correlated to having partnered sex.
I suggest you double-check some of those other assertions, too.
How on earth would anyone know that. Self reporting?
Probably surveys.
The details of the correlation are a but more nuanced than I thought. https://copilot.microsoft.com/shares/m6xF65F5uqWW5drayEJkP
Whose drive is decreasing, men’s or women’s, and why?
Correlation to economic indicators? — I hypothesize that good economy => feel good => do it. We know that strip clubs can be a leading indicator of economic troubles.
My understanding is that it is both men and women. Social media is the probable cause.
Economy is a reasonable hypothesis. I don’t know if it has been tested.
If one wanted to degrade civilization whilst minimizing violence could one hatch a more devious or destructive weapon than social-media?
I myself feel the decline in population is directly related to the lack of drive-in theaters, and vehicles big enough to do the deed in the backseat.
I could be wrong. There are a lot of other things going on.
But in hard economic times? It added a whole new dimension to a cheap date night.
Another way Western society has changed.
https://x.com/lefineder/status/1962620632346304650
I think it was Van Crevald who said “proximity + diversity = war”
A similar item could be said as “Gun control + diversity = robbery.”
The connection you point out between digital distractions and intimacy really resonates—phones and streaming services have become a silent competitor for couple time. What’s striking is that this shift isn’t just affecting young people, but married couples too, which suggests it’s more of a cultural change than just a generational one. I wonder if we’ll eventually see a counter-movement where people intentionally unplug at night to reclaim that lost connection.
True.
I m thinking a lot of it has to do with just being worn out also.
As Vox Day said years ago.
Woman were always consumers. But by pushing them into the work force, it degraded wages as a whole. While maintaining the same amount of consumption. A win-win for business.
So, by the time husband and wife get home and do the kid stuff. They’re warn out.
Top it off with poison food, meds, and constant stress? You get what we got today.
Notice people having the most children are immigrants the government pays to lay around and pop out kids?
And to your last point. You’all do most of your work at night? When you got all that extra power?
Drug injury.
Mostly from SSRIs, benzodiazepines and statins.