Quote of the day—Judith Martin

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating.

Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.

Judith Martin
AKA “Miss Manners”
[I was reminded of this Saturday after making dinner for Barb L. A great number of our dates have not involved any food. It is clear that neither of us are “customary” and this is just one more data point.

For more background–her daughter insisted that Barb change her match.com description of herself to say “eclectic” rather than “eccentric”. I don’t think it would have mattered to me. If eccentric or even weird were to be an issue then the first ten minutes of the first date would have been the end of it.—Joe]


4 thoughts on “Quote of the day—Judith Martin

  1. There’s a fourth element, confidentiality, which increases arithmetically as to the number of dates enjoyed. Just saying, my friend.

  2. I’ve found it interesting that, while most people (men or women) just don’t get me at all, the few that do seem to have this attitude that they’re in on some grand secret that most people around are left out of.

    I blame it on too much Monty Python at such a young age.

    Granted, this is a large part of why my first dates are always limited to just meeting for a drink. Keeps the initial investment low if they really aren’t that interesting.

  3. @Rivrdog, The content of post was discussed and agreed upon before being made public.

    Thanks for the input.

    @Laughingdog, I basically didn’t date (maybe two or three total in high school) until I started seeing the woman who would become my wife of 36+ years. When I started dating again at age 56 it was a little bit strange for me and the women I met (“We shouldn’t be doing this at this age!”). Most appeared to be in a similar situation to me. They had initiated action against their spouses after many years of “trying to make things work”. We had that in common and most had good jobs or were comfortably retired. They almost all were “good people” as near as I could tell. I viewed nearly all as “someone I could get along with”. But only one, Barb L., was “Wow! I’m impressed.” She uses the word “amazing” a lot in regards to me so I think it’s a good match for both of us.

  4. My wife thought I was amazing too, at first. Now she hates me, and probably for good reason even though she doesn’t understand it.

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