Disposing of OBL remains

There’s rumors of his death but there’s also lots of reason to be skeptical. Lack of confirmation of his death and physical possession of his body shouldn’t stop us from planning appropriate disposal of his carcass. Here are my suggestions:

  1. Attitude adjustment. Shove a large dildo “where the sun don’t shine”, freeze him and ship the display to Club Gitmo. Keep him on ice and use him as a motivational tool in interrogations (“You could have a place beside your great and wonderful leader.”)

  2. Warning to others. His carcass fed to the hogs and the video of both the entrance and exit from the alimentary canal put on YouTube.
  3. Grim reminder. His head mounted on a 10 foot pole, be the highest point of anything within ten miles, and be perpetually illuminated with a soft green glow from the glass covering Mecca.