Have you ever had your child threaten to kill you? Yesterday was a first for me. And I thought things were going so well too...

Background: James bought himself a new computer and Xenia asked that he give his old one to her. James thought she was being spoiled but relented and wiped the hard disk before turning it over to her. Then he couldn't find the install disk for Windows XP. I told Xenia to send me an email to remind me and I would get her a new O/S. Our story picks up from this point:

From: Xenia Joy
Sent: Sunday, October 15, 2006 3:30 PM
To: xenia@joehuffman.org
Subject: Operating System

Get me an operating system.

 

-Xenia Joy

Interesting. It's not like she even said please. It's just a command from the little princess. But she left an opening for me to have some fun:

From: Joe Huffman 
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 1:38 PM
To: Xenia Joy
Subject: RE: Operating System

I got one. It's in the trunk of the car. Windows '95 should do, right?

-dad-

From: Xenia Joy
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 2:54 PM
To: Joe Huffman
Subject: RE: Operating System

If you give me Windows ’95, you die.

From: Joe Huffman
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 3:04 PM
To: Xenia Joy
Subject: RE: Operating System

<gulp> What happens if I get you Windows 3.0?

-dad-

 

From: Xenia Joy
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 4:45 PM
To: Joe Huffman
Subject: RE: Operating System

You die slower.

From: Joe Huffman [mailto:Joe@joehuffman.org]
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 5:32 PM
To: 'xenia@xeniajoy.com'
Subject: RE: Operating System

Hmmmm... I think maybe I like that. I like dying at the slowest rate possible. I guess this means I need to get you DOS 1.0. Will that get me a death in say 2100?

 

-dad-

From: Xenia Joy
Sent: Monday, October 16, 2006 6:56 PM
To: Joe Huffman
Subject: RE: Operating System

No, you die over a 24 hour period.