Quote of the day—Mike Monteiro @Monteiro

We are going to take your guns and melt them into whatever fucked up weird machinery is used to harvest kale.

Mike Monteiro @Monteiro
Tweeted on October 20, 2015
[Molon labe Mike.

Don’t ever let anyone get away with telling you no one wants to take your guns.—Joe]


18 thoughts on “Quote of the day—Mike Monteiro @Monteiro

    • That was my first thought too.

      Isn’t kale harvested by hand?

      I know that’s how they do it with it’s cousin broccoli up in Maine.

  1. Huh. I suppose he figures machinery used to harvest wheat is fucked-up, too. I’ll bet he thinks carrot-pickers are fucked-up looking. And, for God’s sake, don’t show him a cotton picker.

    This is the same type of coastal, elitist prick who is dimly aware that there is a place where food comes from, but since he’s not there, everything from there is foreign and odd. And firearms are just too icky. What’s the word for that? Xenophobic?

    • +1 Pure metrosexual male whose only idea of “technology” is his smartphone and x-box. The notion that there are mechanical devices extant in the world that he doesn’t understand – from firearms to farm machinery — is quite frightening to him, so he reacts with fear and loathing. If his kind wasn’t so prevalent, they’d be pitiable.

      What’s particularly funny, is he’s also likely to be the first in line to sneer at the farmers, ranchers, equipment operators, and other tradesmen who actually keep the country running.

  2. Gonna be a lotta dyin’ on your part, Mikey! Or don’t you realize that your ilk will instigate a civil war?

    • I think they believe that they’ll be bystanders, sitting on the sidelines happily observing everything on the TV from the supposed safety of their living rooms.

  3. But I like kale. And guns. Why can’t I have both? Oh, I know, I’ll make Mike harvest my kale at gunpoint. Sorry, just being snarky as I can’t take him seriously and his turn of phrase is mildly amusing.

    • Yeah, I guess he hates hunters, or meat-eaters in general, and so he figures that the prospect of making confiscated guns into kale harvesters is a kind of double insult.

      I assume we’re supposed to be intimidated as well as insulted. If that is the case, one wonders how or why millions of rational, armed Americans would be either insulted or intimidated by the rantings a few unarmed, irrational, and apparently mentally deficient and emotionally charged individuals.

      I don’t suppose he’s considered what it would actually take to confiscate my guns, and those of millions of other lovers of the American Principles of Liberty, or how many people would be willing to die for the chance to try taking so many people’s guns by force.

      My garden inadvertently feeds the deer all summer, and then I shoot one deer in the Fall and eat it along with my remaining garden vegetables. Apparently that (along with the very thought of self defense as being a human right) is enough to send someone into a state of apoplectic hatred.

      Well if they enjoy the thrill of being enraged (or are addicted to it), then who or what can stop their rage and yet leave them alive and breathing? I am not sure I know the answer to that question.

      Mike’s provocation could be seen, on the other hand, as a cry for help. “Surely there must be someone with some f-ing sense and some compassion in the world, and if I yell and scream and bounce up and down enough, surely that person would present himself.” Don’t completely discount the possibility. Small children do this, and so it is only rational to consider that an adult would also do it in some form or other.

  4. Well, the collectors or guns will need guns. So after the first collection, they’ll need another one. But those folks will need guns. This goes on long enough and everybody in the world will be working for gun companies, and they won’t have enough parking.

    Bonus points if you get my TV show reference.

  5. Not if I take your kale and use it to fuel whatever fucked up weird machinery is used to make firearms.

  6. Just who is this mythical “We” he talks about taking our firearms?

    Will he lead the stick himself into my breached front door and earn himself a groin shot of double-ought buck or will he keep his hands clean and have minions do the dirty work in 100 million households? I think not and too few enforcers will try this nonsense.

    So, I’m not fearful of a ranting, and likely unarmed metrosexual.

    Fantasy land…isn’t it funny that even there, the unicorns are armed with a nasty spike on their head?

    • There you go, Braden!

      Who the heck is “:we”,

      “We” know that “they” are planning to co-opt law enforcement into taking a run (fools errand) at taking our goodies.

      “We”, my butt…

      Jeff B.

  7. It’s foolish rants like this that make me appreciate David Conrad’s standard response to these declarations:

    “No. Your move.”

    To which I might add, just for good measure:

    “Bring it, cupcake.”

  8. I honestly thought that kale was harvested with the bare feet of sweaty Pakistani cab drivers…since that’s what it tastes like.

    • I find it odd that you know what “the bare feet of sweaty Pakistani cab drivers” taste like.


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