I’ve been reading the posts on varies blog and people have been sending me email of videos (thank you Rob) and links.
I like this one best (thank you Kris):
Like I have said before, next on my list is the TSA. I wish I had the time and money to work on them full time. As I have said before I think I could have a lot of fun with them.
I could probably get you some aluminized mylar from the trash can at work, we have plenty of it!
5 years ago I proposed an airline where you would have to fly nude and kiss a piece of bacon to get on the plane. At the time people said I was crazy. I am a bit of a nudist.
But I would just say “if you got to go on the plane without any security checks at all wouldn’t you do it”. Everyone who was not ashamed of their bodies would say your right sign me up.
That was back when they had just introduced taking your shoes off.
I swear if you just walked into a separate nudes only check in building this thing would take off like a on time plane.
By the way if you have every gone to a hot springs which is clothing optional you learn quickly that most folks should keep their clothes on.
Anyone feel free to take my idea and run with it!
I wonder what the consequences would be if I attached loaded mousetraps to my underwear and opted for the hand search rather than the scanner.
JMD,
An entertaining thought. Imagine though, the consequences of a “wardrobe malfunction…….”
I know others have suggested the idea that we create an airline that simply didn’t have security checks–you would be free to carry anything onto that plane, with the understanding that everyone else would have that same freedom…and see how many people would willingly take the risk to fly on that airline.
I, for one, would be willing to take that risk!
My favorite:
Seconded. As I was telling my father a few days ago, it seems as though private, charter air companies have something of a suddenly-available niche market for them to fill… People are going to get more and more annoyed with the airline situation, and as they get annoyed, they are will be more and more willing to pay a premium for a flight that does not involve either getting electronically stripped or sexually abused by strangers.
He should probably add, “or be your physician” after “buy you dinner”
I wonder how long this policy would last if, on every flight two children, whose parents refused the X-ray test because of radiation concerns (or kiddie porn, dunno which would have more traction) shouted, “he’s touching me in my private area!”
However, based on firehand’s commentary on what Soviets or German Jews could or could not have done before the freight cars came, I expect this tactic will be first used by our enemies.
I enjoyed Tam’s recent suggestion on how to deal with them. I don’t fly for personal trips anymore, and have managed to make sure I just get the work trips I can do by motorcycle for nearly a year now. But if I have to fly for work again, and I have to get groped to avoid that stupid backscatter machine, I’m going to make that TSA person feel so freaking uncomfortable that he/she has nightmares afterward.
I’ll have to watch a lot of “Big Gay Al” and “Mr. Slave” from South Park to really up the creepy factor. Maybe even finish with a “call me” after it is over.