Too much information–Take 2

Since my post on my colonoscopy last week was so popular (over 100 referrals in the last 16 hours) I thought I might bump the readership numbers still more by reposting something from UseNet from nearly 17 years ago. The details of my vasectomy:

From joe@proto.COM Wed Aug 15 11:59:07 1990
Path: proto!joe
From: joe@proto.COM (Joe Huffman)
Newsgroups: misc.kids
Subject: Re: Vasectomy
Summary: I am pleased with the results.
Message-ID: <1392@proto.COM>
Date: 15 Aug 90 18:59:07 GMT
References: <SCOTTP.90Aug14093250@bwdlh461.bnr.ca>
Distribution: misc
Organization: Prototronics; Sandpoint, Idaho
Lines: 110

In article <SCOTTP.90Aug14093250@bwdlh461.bnr.ca>, scottp@bwdlh461.bnr.ca
(Scott Pace) writes:
> I would like to hear from anyone out there who has experienced a
> vasectomy (or knows someone who has).

What do you want to know?  As a means of birth control it has been successful.
I got mine about 2 years ago and I haven’t got anybody pregnant yet.

The operation was relatively painless.  The doctor and I talked about
computer programming most of the time during the surgery.  I had some
slight internal bleeding in the scrotum area that left a bruise appearing
discoloration for about a week and a half.  This is normal.  The doctor
told me to take some pain pills before the novacaine wore off, go home put
a ice pack under my shorts and go to bed for the afternoon.
I got bored in bed and keep waiting for the pain to kick in after the
novacaine wore off but it NEVER did ache or hurt.  I finally got up and
went to work on my computer in the other room.  No orgasms allowed for
one week after the surgery (one of the toughest parts of the whole thing). 
No heavy physical activity allowed either.  It was a bit tender for a week
or two but no big deal as long as the kids didn’t jump on me.  A month after
the surgery it was nearly impossible to see the incision marks.  In 2 months
it was impossible.  I had to use other methods of birth control until I got a
0 sperm count.  That normally takes about 3 months.  My first count (at 3
months post surgery) was 2 dead ones.  A month later it came back 0.  So 4
months past before other methods were deemed unnecessary.

—–
>>>DETAILED<<< DESCRIPTION OF PROCEDURE FOLLOWS
—–

The doctor had a pre-surgery consultation and advised me of all the risks.
The ones I remember were:
1) About 1 out of 200 fail and have to be redone.
2) Some number (I forget how many) develop a nodule at the point of
blockage.  This may get as large as 3/4 of an inch in diameter.  Usually it
is painless but sometimes it must be removed with surgery.  I think I have a
very small occurance of that on my right side.
3) It should be considered permanent.  Reversal rate is about 80% but it is
much more involved, more costly, and of course less successful.

This was our GP and I asked how many he had performed, he told me about
300.  I asked about complications that he had observed.  He told me that he
had one patient that had to be redone, he had done nothing different in that
case that he was aware of.  One patient was riding his motercycle about
three days later and ending up pushing it some distance when the engine
failed and he was bedridden for a couple days afterwards.  With one
procedure the guy was more nervous than most but made it through one side
without freaking out.  The doctor put in the stich on that side and said,
“Now we’ll do the OTHER side.”  At which point the patient did ‘freak’ for
a while.  🙂

He instructed me to shave the front of my scrotum the morning of the
surgery.  The surgery was to be at about 10:00 AM.  I went in a bit early
and they started early due to a previous patient canceling.   The nurse
(Viki, beautiful woman, but that’s irrelevent, or is it?) had me take off my
pants and lay down.  She draped my stomach -> thigh area with sterile
sheets with an opening for my scrotum and penis.  She complemented me on
the shaving I had done and said she wouldn’t have to do any more.  She then
scrubbed the front of my scrotum for (a timed) five minutes.  We had a nice
chat about how it had worked out for her and her husband (she was very
pleased and indicated he hadn’t had any problems with it).  She draped
that area and got the doctor.  He put on latex gloves and manipulated the
vas deferens to the front of the scrotum (it is normally near the rear).
He then used a clamp to hold it place near the surface while he got the
syringe in his hand.  He warned that this would hurt for a little bit.  He
poked the needle upwards skewering the vas deference lengthwise, this HURT
until he started injecting the material.  He then pulled the needle out of
the vas deferens, but not the scrotum, and repeated in the downward
direction.  He then made an incision about 3/8 inch long vertically above
the vas deferens between the jaws of the clamp where he had made the
injection.  He cauterized a few blood vessels that were bleeding and
pulled the vas deferens out of the scrotum so that about a 1 inch section
was exposed.  I could feel some tugging on my testicles but it was not
painful.  He ‘stripped’ the sheath that contains blood vessels from
around the vas deferens being careful keep damage to a minimum.  When about
3/4 inches of the vas deferens was exposed he tied it off in two places
about 1/2 inch apart.  He then used a scaphel to cut a section about 1/4
inch long from between the two places that were tied off.  This section
was set aside to be set to a lab for “identification”.  I asked if he had
ever had a lab report indicate he had made a mistake and he said, “No”
(then why do it?  I didn’t ask, but I suspect it is insurance against
lawsuits).  He then cauterized the two ends of the vas deferens.  This was
to seal the ends (in addition to being tied off).  He then put the severed
vas back in the scrotum and put in a single stitch.

Repeat for the other side.

Through all the surgery Viki would come in and ask how things were going
and chatted with us a bit.  The doctor had a mother cat that had kittens and
Viki had picked up one of the kittens a couple weeks earlier…

They gave me some pain pills (which I only used one doseage of), some gauze,
and instructions on how to care for the incision site.  No big deal, I was
to keep it dry for 24 hours, and change the dressing if it became blood
soaked.  I had some minor external bleeding for about 1 1/2 days and had to
keep the gauze pads in place to avoid bleeding on my underwear.

From the time I walked in until I walked out it took about an hour and 45
minutes.  Actual surgery was about 50 minutes or so.

I think it was about 4 days later I went in and had the stitches removed.

Anything I left out?



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