Quote of the day–Jeff Cooper

Family member Dr. Werner Weissenhofer reports from Vienna. It seems that a felon armed with a 357 revolver robbed a bank. As he left the bank, he was accosted by a policeman whom he murdered with one shot. Great excitement ensued, with the felon taking hostages and racing madly around from one store to another. When the forces of law and order had been mobilized and surrounded the goblin, a policeman volunteered to trade himself to the goblin for two hostages. This offer was accepted, at which time the felon fired at the policeman and seriously wounded him. The forces of law and order opened up with everything they had, which was mostly AUG and Glock fire. Shortly, the goblin killed himself with one round. He had fired three times and achieved three hits. The police, according to their official report, fired 1,261 rounds without drawing blood.

At one time, we used to refer to an event of this sort as a “Chinese Fire Drill.” Later we came to call if “Father’s Day in Harlem.” After the interment of the Ayatollah Khomeini, we began to call it “An Iranian Funeral.” Now, I guess we can call it “A Viennese Bank Robbery.”

As I have often stated, if someone wants to shoot at me, I sure hope he does it on full-auto.

Jeff Cooper
Jeff Cooper’s Commentaries
Vol. 1, No. 9
October 1993